Fancy a Quickie?

Yes, yes apologies. I've not been in contact for two months; I do have a valid excuse though. Since moving into my villa on November 25, I have not had access to the internet. The irony of living in Internet City yet not being able to get the internet was quite funny for the first couple of weeks. Now, however, I am a pent up ball of aggression waiting to verbally annihilate any incompetent customer serviceman that I can actually get through to. The internet provider etisalat's "helpline" is of no help at all; it's constantly busy and it seems impossible to actually speak to anyone other than the automated Arab who tells you to "call back later" - in Arabic.

Obviously loads has happened in the past two months and all will be revealed and revelled in once I have my connection (which should be this week), but until then I will leave you with a fabulous fact:

Last weekend I ended up drinking bottomless Bollinger at the Burj Al Arab.

All hatemail to the usual address please.