Eid Mubarek! (Happy Eid)
Ramadan is officially over. Which should, and in a way does, mean celebrations. However, Dubai do celebrations rather differently to Britain.
Instead of having a day off work and heading down the Red Lion -- where you will proceed to neck six pints of Stella and swing some plastic garden furniture above your head while singing sectarian anthems -- in Dubai they celebrate by having three days off work and not drinking any alcohol at all for the first 24 hours.
So Eid Al Fitr is now upon us, which means the restrictions that Ramadan enforced -- restrictions that saw me crouched, yoga-like, in the back of friends' cars while pouring water down my throat, and stuffing full pies into my mouth to chew in rapid bursts whenever there were no cars close by -- are gone. No longer applicable. Kaput.
Today I drank a Lime and Kiwi shake and ate lunch in broad daylight. And nobody tried to have me arrested.
I could even have drank a cold beer in public today, but that's not because the holy month is over, but rather because I was in a different emirate: I was in Umm Al Qwain. Alcohol is forever forbidden in public in the emirate of Dubai but it seems in Umm A Qwain you can booze by the beach.
I went to Dreamland Aqua Park which seems to be in the middle of nowhere, but, word of advice, if you are ever looking for it, don't waste your time asking an Arab, just grab an expat because Dreamland Aqua Park is next door to Barracuda (Booze &) Beach Resort. One of only two places (and the only legal one) in a 100km radius where you can buy the blood of Barry Ooze.
I bought 72 cans of beer (x24 Carlsberg, x24 Stella Artois, x24 Beer X), two bottles (75cl) of Stoichnaya vodka and a bottle of Filipino Rum. I also bought a keg of beer which is probably as undrinkable as it is unpronounceable. But it was cheap.
Final bill: Dh285 (£44).
So tonight, just as soon as the slumbering Mr Smith arises from his stinking, godforsaken pit, we are celebrating the end of Ramadan. And seeing as he's off tomorrow and I don't start until 3pm, something tells me things could get messy...
Instead of having a day off work and heading down the Red Lion -- where you will proceed to neck six pints of Stella and swing some plastic garden furniture above your head while singing sectarian anthems -- in Dubai they celebrate by having three days off work and not drinking any alcohol at all for the first 24 hours.
So Eid Al Fitr is now upon us, which means the restrictions that Ramadan enforced -- restrictions that saw me crouched, yoga-like, in the back of friends' cars while pouring water down my throat, and stuffing full pies into my mouth to chew in rapid bursts whenever there were no cars close by -- are gone. No longer applicable. Kaput.
Today I drank a Lime and Kiwi shake and ate lunch in broad daylight. And nobody tried to have me arrested.
I could even have drank a cold beer in public today, but that's not because the holy month is over, but rather because I was in a different emirate: I was in Umm Al Qwain. Alcohol is forever forbidden in public in the emirate of Dubai but it seems in Umm A Qwain you can booze by the beach.
I went to Dreamland Aqua Park which seems to be in the middle of nowhere, but, word of advice, if you are ever looking for it, don't waste your time asking an Arab, just grab an expat because Dreamland Aqua Park is next door to Barracuda (Booze &) Beach Resort. One of only two places (and the only legal one) in a 100km radius where you can buy the blood of Barry Ooze.
I bought 72 cans of beer (x24 Carlsberg, x24 Stella Artois, x24 Beer X), two bottles (75cl) of Stoichnaya vodka and a bottle of Filipino Rum. I also bought a keg of beer which is probably as undrinkable as it is unpronounceable. But it was cheap.
Final bill: Dh285 (£44).
So tonight, just as soon as the slumbering Mr Smith arises from his stinking, godforsaken pit, we are celebrating the end of Ramadan. And seeing as he's off tomorrow and I don't start until 3pm, something tells me things could get messy...
posted by Sheikh Gareemi Nahan at 6:16 PM
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